Let Me Hear Your Body Talk

Bestie and I went out to The Sheaf on the weekend - a watering hole in Rose Bay which attracts some of the more attractive animals from the Sydney jungle, and is therefore an attractive destination to frequent as a young, single female.  A good time is always guaranteed there. It's a bit like Brisbane's Royal Exchange Hotel- except without the ever present stink of stale beer and vomit wafting up from beneath the deck's floor boards.

It just being Bestie and I, we found ourselves to be easy targets by gentlemen who were out on the prowl. It's that whole 'divide and conquer' techinque - two women standing together alone are much easier to speak to than a whole gaggle of women. Anyway, I would have been fine with all this useless chit-chat if the men who were approaching us weren't rude, judgemental idiots.

Upon being approached by a duo of men, (who in honesty, and judge me if you will, we wouldn't have blinked at in any other circumstance), both men began talking to Bestie, leaving me to stand silenty with my hands in my pockets, listening to their conversation. I wasn't grumpy. I wasn't bored. I was simply being silent. However, despite this being the case, one of the gentleman who appeared to be the alpha, turned to me and said, "Why are you so serious?"

Me? Serious? You've got to be kidding, right? I'm about as serious as a joke store.

To which I replied, "I'm not being serious. I'm just standing here."

To which he replied, "Well, you look serious. You look serious and unapproachable."

Me? Unapproachable? You've got to be kidding, right? I'm about as unapproachable as an excited puppy in a playground.

To which I replied, "Get out of my face, you judgemental ass! Why don't you take your serious and unapproachable and stick it were the sun don't shine!"

Ha - not really.

But what did follow was a rather heated conversation about this man judging me without any clue about what kind of person I am.

Now while I understand and agree that something like 80% of what you express is through body language, I don't understand or agree with this man coming up and accusing me of being serious and unapproachable. As far as I am concerned, I was being neither. I was being silent. I was waiting for the conversation to take a direction I could join in with. And if this man wanted to get to know me, he could have asked me anything else other than "Why are you so serious?" He could have asked where I was from, what I did for a living, what kind of shampoo I like to use - questions I would have been happy to answer and which would have given him a little insight into the kind of girl I am. But no - this presuming idiot decided to go fire up all my cylinders with 'serious and unapproachable.'

What I didn't appreciate was the fact that, according to this man, I was not allowed to be silent and inactive. I was not participating in the conversation because it was not my conversation to participate in, not because I was being haughty and disinterested. What was I meant to do? Whip out a sudoku while my friend finished her conversation? Whack a toothey fake smile on my face in case anyone was confused about whether I was happy and excited to be there? I WAS happy and excited to be there! And if this man had taken the time to start a conversation with me before jumping to conclusions about my being 'serious and unapproachable' he might have worked out that I am A HAPPY AND EXCITING PERSON TO SPEAK TO!

Anyway, his loss. Bestie and I made a quick getaway to the bar where we ran into a strange South African man who said he thought I was adorable. And then kissed me on the lips. But it's okay, he was gay.

At least, I think he was. You never can tell at The Sheaf.

Ciao for now. xo

(Image Credit: Audrey Hepburn Complex and So About What I Said)